Sunday, November 01, 2009

Counter Monkey Conversations

Notice the fine ass on this magazine cover? Sorry for the picture quality it's the best I could do on short notice.

Last night my asst. manager "Sam" and I were spending a lot of time admiring this fine piece of meat. At one point we were standing at the end of the counter next to the bathrooms and having a little dialogue. We were the only ones in the store at the time. We were talking very loudly.

Trashman: "Hey Sam. That's got to be the greatest ass in the world."
Sam: "Yeah that is a beautiful ass."
Trashman: "I would eat that ass like it was pussy."
Sam: "I know man. It's a fucking work of art."
Trashman: "I would eat the shit out of her ass."
Sam: "You have no idea the things I would eat out of her ass."
Trashman: "I would take a miners light and make sure I got every inch of that sphincter. I would wash her guts with my tongue."

That's when we heard the flush in the men's room. Our heads snapped up from looking at the cover to staring at each other like a couple of deer caught in the head lights. I said "Who knew?" I don't know why I said it I just did. Sam busted out laughing and ran in the office. I grabbed my cup and went to the soda machine. The whole time I was telling Sam how nasty he was, let him take the heat. The men's room door opened and a guy came walking out. He didn't look at me, he just stared straight ahead. Sam is in the office howling like a crazy person, I'm at the soda machine watching the guy and the guy ain't looking at nothing but the door. He wanted out. As he opened the door to leave I said "Have a good weekend sir." Nothing. No wave, no thank you, no middle finger, nada. How rude.

Keep on keeping on.